Sunday, May 29, 2011

2 Year Reflection

Today marks the 2 year anniversary of my Dad's death. So much has happened in that time...I went to Taiwan for the 2nd time; the birth of two nieces (granddaughters); Ben started a new job; Nathan started a new job; Kyle, Nathan, Sallee, Claire all moved to California; we sold the house in Oregon; Mom moved to Utah; Joel completed his doctorate; Joel, Becky, Aubrey moved to Boston; Joel started a new job at Harvard; Erick started a new job; plus many, many more.
Many of those things have been exciting, scary, fun, hard, sad, etc. changes. Some we have looked forward to and others we have dragged our feet all the way.
These last two years have been great, full of fun and new adventures and at the same time they have been two of the hardest years that I have ever lived through.
We got family pictures taken at Christmas and my Mom and I were talking the other day about my wanting to get some printed to put in my frames for my wall, but my Mom pointed out that I didn't want to replace all of the pictures because than I wouldn't have any with my Dad in them.
Sometimes it's hard to think about that in all of the future family pictures he won't be in them, he won't be part of the family vacations, when I find my future spouse he won't be there to give him a hard time or to be part of my wedding day, and when more grandchildren come he won't get to meet them. But then I think about the grand picture, he is part of all these events, I may not be able to see him but I know that he is watching.
I miss my Dad and I don't think there will ever be a time that I don't miss him, but I am grateful for him, the things that he has taught me (and continues to teach me) and that I know that I will be with him again. I'm grateful that I have the pictures to remind me of the memories but even more grateful that I have the memories.

I know this may sound a little dorky or cheesy (yes it is Miley Cyrus), but I love this song, every time I hear it I think of my Dad. I think that it describes him so well (besides the part about having to do it on his own)...he was always there for me, ready to help, love, teach, share, serve, anything that was needed.

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